Earlier this week, I was faced with a really rude comment from a reader. Well, check that. I can’t swear that he was a reader of my blog. Because if he was a regular reader of the blog, he’d know all about all the drama that I have been going through the last year.
Either way – this reader who called themselves “Drem” was really rude. I’m assuming it’s a “he” as well, so if he/she/it is reading and I’m wrong, my apologies… but Drem posted a comment on the blog that said this:
Idiot Running Girl… why do you look so FAT when you seem to be running for so long now?
Ouch. That wasn’t very nice. At first I was really hurt: My weight is something I am very sensitive about in general, not because of what others think of me, but because of how I feel. And I feel fluffy right now, with about 30 extra pounds around my middle. Then I got angry: Who the hell did this guy think he is calling ME fat?! And hiding behind the keyboard in order to do so? How rude!
Then I started to feel amused whole thing. I work in social media for a living, dude. I stare at a plethora of pages on the daily, reading some of the most evil, cruel, rude and obnoxious things people feel brave saying on an internet forum. This is the very first negative comment I have received in my blogging career, and I was going to let this guy get the best of me?
When I posted about the whole thing on my Facebook page, I was met with some of the nicest comments from people. Your kind words and evil names for this guy were exactly what I needed to hear, despite my brave facade. Because I did let him hurt me a little bit, but after reading all of your kind words, I felt better about the whole situation.
And truth of the matter is this: Why ya gotta be so mean? Is it not enough that I’m out there, running, trying to bring the best of me forward? Is it not enough that I’m eating a health meal instead of the junk food I am craving at the moment? Is it not enough for you? And why should any of this matter to you?
Never have I ever been mean to someone about what they were doing fitness wise. Never have I ever judged someone, told them they were “too fat” to do something, or criticized them for not fitting into the perfect mold of what an athlete should look like and that’s because they come in all shapes and sizes. If you are out there, doing what is necessary to be healthy, then what does it matter what I look like?
I texted a friend of mine whom I used to be really close to this morning to let her know that a mutual friend of ours was now back in town, and back at News4Jax. She then told me that she thinks of me every time she drove past my condo to get to her gym. That started a conversation about her working out and the like, because we used to be gym rats together back in the day (when the best gym EVER was still open. UGH. I miss Cory Evereson’s gym!)
She’s a member of the Brooks YMCA. She told me she does yoga, and swims laps the pool. I was impressed. I’m STILL impressed. She’s a tall girl, a bigger girl like me, and she’s out there doing amazing things at the gym. And when I told her that, you know what she said to me?
I finally got to the point of I’m done being out of shape. I’m always going to be a large woman but I can be healthy.
And that…that is the most important part. It’s not your pant size, or your dress size. It’s not the skimpy bikinis that you wear at the beach, or the amount of weight you throw around the gym. It’s not the pace of the mile you run, or the amount of box jumps you do at CrossFit. It’s not any of that. It’s that you are a healthy person, both physically and mentally. And anyone who tells you otherwise is a damn fool.
Bottom line is this: Sure “Drem” hurt my feelings for a bit by calling me fat. But this “fat girl” runs half marathons for fun. She walks the stairs every day, numerous times a day, instead of taking the elevator at work. She gave up soda despite it being my achilies’ heel. She says no to the pizza that her station bring in to cover major events, and eats her hummus, her salad, her roasted veggies and fish instead. She doesn’t take no for an answer when it comes to getting her health back, and when she trips and falls, she gets right back up and goes back to what she was doing before.
She’s focused, and she’s dedicated. She’s smart and she’s determined. She may be fat, but she’s pretty sure she runs more than he does, if he even runs at all.
So, Drem, if you are a real reader and not just a troll looking to be a pain in the ass of the world… here’s the thing: You can be negative, hateful and cruel all you want. All you are going to do is prove yourself unworthy of kindness and the optimism that gets me through 13.1 miles. For fun. Have a great day!