A Runner Fail – also known as Jamie and Bugs don’t mix

And in this case when I say bugs, I mean a seriously pissed off wasp. At least, that’s what Brian said it was.

I said it was an African killer wasp that was bound and determined to kill me because I looked at it funny or something. 

There I was, running along and listening to my music, trying to distract myself from the fact that it was super smokey outside and I didn’t feel like doing anything because I am distracted and just didn’t particularly care much. I figured that a run would do me good anyway. Suddenly I look down and see this shadow thing flying around my shadow. Then I looked at my legs and saw it.

I freaked.

I jumped and swatted and screamed, then started to run again, but the little shit followed me. I start to panic now. I look behind me and see Brian, so I run toward him. It follows me. I’m now running into traffic (thank God they missed me) and start to panic.

“Why is it following me?!” I scream, jumping around and trying to escape it. Brian starts to yell at me to stop running.

“I’m done, I want to go home, I don’t want to run anymore,” I say, on the brink of tears…then I see that it’s still there circling me. I freak out again. Brian yelled at me to run, to calm down, and told me to just run home. I took off toward the condo, and the wasp stuck with Brian. I run anyway, because he knows that if I stick around it’s going to be worse.

I stop a few times to look over my shoulder and see Brian running around in loops trying to lose it, but it doesn’t work. When he finally swats it hard enough, it hits the ground and he stomps on that thing like crazy. Then he starts walking toward me. So I start walking…in the center of the two lane street because there was no way in hell I was getting close to those trees again. Thankfully, there was no traffic.

I apologized profusly about how much of a wimp I was, and he understood. He knows that I have a deep seated terror of bugs. He also explained that being afraid of something like that – a wasp or a bee or a hornet – is completely understandable. It’s how I jump when a fly comes near me that he doesn’t understand. I can’t explain it. I’m just seriously scared of those things.

That was, by far, the most terrifying 1.35 mile run of my life.

I think I might be avoiding that route for a while.

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